Taking Orders From Your Grasshopper

[dapper_dan]

Not too long ago I watched Lilo & Stitch for the second time. I also got to watch Pinocchio when I wasn’t dead tired and could stay awake through the whole thing. I’m of the opinion that one of these movies is wonderful and the other is a complete piece of crap. It took me watching the documentary on the Pinocchio DVD to completely understand why.

Stitch, as a character meant to entertain and influence children is horrible. Not only is he completely unsympathetic, but he’s also a horrible influence on impressionable young minds. Let us now compare the messages that one might take away from Lilo & Stitch to the ones in Pinocchio.

Stitch	Pinocchio
A creature made with the sole purpose of causing mass destruction is cuddly.	“A lie grows and grows until it’s as plain as the nose on your face.” This happens quite literally.
Spitting, slobbering, and other crude behavior is comic gold.	“Give a bad boy enough rope, and he’ll soon make a jackass of himself.” Also literally happens.
“O’hana means family, and family means that nobody gets left behind, or forgotten.” So no matter how destructive you are to the other members of that family, or everything and everyone around it, as long as you stick together, everything will be OK.	“A boy who won’t be good, might just as well be made of wood.”

I tried really hard to find something good to take from Stitch, but there really is nothing.